When you have had to pull through some of life’s greatest challenges, and you can look back with pride and gratitude, you know you are living fully. Patricia Hansen has a beautiful heart, a caring and generous soul, and she understands what it’s like to live with a mental illness, help a child through cancer recovery and wellness, and be a mother, wife and entrepreneur. Her story of resilience and strength will inspire you. She is this week’s Woman of the Week.
Thank you so much for honouring me in this way Pierrette! Writing about myself, my life and everything in between has been a challenging but interesting exercise for me. I’m putting myself out there and trusting the universe. This is my story and I’m proud of it.
Tell us a little about yourself.
I am a 53 year old mother of 6. I have 4 children of my own and 2 step children. Sadly, my step children lost their mother when they were young. Together, Mike and I raised three boys and three girls. I take great pride in the fact that first of all we all survived the chaos, love, laughter and tears and secondly these children have grown into amazing adults. They support one another and are close. This summer two of our children married, one in June and one in July. All of the children were asked to take part in both weddings. Amazing!! Ten years ago I did not see this coming and periodically asked myself “how are we going to get through this?”. Having them ask one another to take part in their weddings was the light at the end of the tunnel. For obvious reasons, today Mike and I are beaming with pride. To date I/we have 5 grandchildren, two boys and three girls. More are on the way.
I grew up in a small town just south of Ottawa, raised my/our children in this town and we are still here today. I speak from experience when talking about small towns and the pros and cons of living in one. I can tell you I have been on the receiving end of what a community can do when you need it most. I am forever grateful and have felt blessed in many, many ways.
Although I physically haven’t worked outside the home in quite some time, I was an administrator first in family law and then high tech. I loved it! All of it!! 1.5 years ago I started my own gift business and am happily and sometimes nervously learning how to run a business on my own terms.
What are some of the biggest challenges you have had to overcome in your life?
Challenges, like a lot of the woman in this group, I’ve had a few.
I was raised in an alcoholic home, married young and was diagnosed with chronic depression in my early twenties and then anxiety and PTSD about 10 years ago.
Caring for my stepson while he underwent cancer treatment and then my father in his final few months of life was extremely difficult. I’m proud of the fact that I was able to do this but it definitely took its tole on me physically and emotionally.
Throughout my life I have experienced instability issues, financial issues, overwhelm issues, crisis and a lot of loss.
What did you do to move through these challenges? What did you learn? What do you wish to share with others?
Honestly, I’m not sure how I managed to moved through everything. There were periods of time where I felt numb and exhausted. Somehow I just moved through each challenge with hope, love, empathy, compassion and honesty. I seem to always bounce back and am always searching for ways to grow and improve myself. I see the best in everyone and everything.
I have learned many lessons throughout my life but the biggest came while caring for my stepson while he had cancer.
This is what I want people to know…. It’s ok to ask for help! When faced with times of struggle, reach out! When people offer to help, let them!
I am forever grateful for the circle of friends, family and community that helped us through this difficult time.
Right now I am in a good place. The children are grown and have left the nest. I am slowly catching my breath and learning how to take care of myself and invest in myself.
I have also learned that I have to be mindful and respectful of my illness as it can have serious consequences.
Who inspires you in your life? Who do you look up to and why?
Throughout my life I have always looked for inspiration from others. Often though, I found myself comparing myself to others instead of finding inspiration.
Having said that, without a doubt the one person who has inspired me the most in my life has been Jonathan Pitre. He and his family have had a tremendous impact on my life. I started following Jonathan’s story a few years ago when he was initially interviewed by The Ottawa Citizen. After scheduling a meeting with his mother, I committed myself both personally and professionally to helping him with his wish to spread awareness and raise funding for DEBRA Canada. Jonathan single-handedly pulled me out of a recent setback with depression. How could I not push myself to get up, get dressed and face the day after watching one of his videos!!
He and his family are truly amazing people. I love and admire absolutely everything about them.
What are you most proud of?
Without question I am most proud of our children.
I am also very proud of Mike and I. We went through a ton of things, good, bad and very difficult. We beat the odds and we are still together. Our family is in tact!
Today I am also proud of myself! I am living fully and moving forward! It sometimes feels awkward, confusing, exciting and frightening, but I am moving forward and I’m loving it.
What do you want your older self to know?
I did my best with what I had! And, people will remember how I made them feel.
Favorite quote.
I have a couple.
“Patty, you can run with the movers and shakers but always remember you understand the moved and shaken”. My Dad
“I’ve learned that, people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” Maya Angelou
PS – My father had 32 years of sobriety when he died. I saw him at his best.
PPS – Corey is 12 years cancer free.
